How do you say good bye?

It is an obvious fact I work in an area that deals with life and death. Thankfully most of the time we are celebrating the birth of a baby, even though tiny. Today I am putting my thoughts and feelings on the line, because it means so much more. This is very hard for me to do, I am a person that does not share my thoughts and feelings with the world. It just goes to show you that God works in mysterious ways that are out of our control.
A couple of weeks ago I was caring for a tiny micro baby- many tubes, wires, IV's --very technical and you need to have your wits about you at all times taking care of these precious miracles. At the same time, my daughter Caitlin, was leaving the country, getting on a plane and flying thousands of miles across the ocean. Only a mother can understand this feeling of loss. I am so excited for her and her new adventures, because I love to travel and experience new cultures and people. What the heck--I was married in Germany.
Back to the story--this little baby was very sick and I took care of this baby for a few days. But on Sunday 2 weeks ago, I ended up being canceled from my shift by a weird chance of events. This is the day I got the call that Caitlin had been admitted to hospital in Graz, Austria. They wouldn't even let her make the trip back to Vienna, she was so sick. Later that day, I got a call that this tiny baby had also died. God knew I couldn't deal with both of these events. He knew my own baby came first and needed my prayers and support. So, I must say good bye to my little charge and know she is in a better place.
But ending on a happy note, Caitlin is better, started back to school today, with a short day. Has been riding the tram and metro. And hopefully will head off on a German adventure .in about 10 days. Mothers can't help themselves when they worry to death. At least, I can't. And I had to write this to help me have resolution with everything that has gone on the last couple of weeks.